Bah Humbug?

I'm feeling sad. I don't know exactly why but it's just there. Hanging over my head like some evil anti-mistletoe or something.

M is sitting in the living room playing on his work laptop. He's addicted to some game called "NetHack". I don't understand it but...hey whatever! LOL He's also watching Deal or No Deal and laughing whenever someone gets a high case. He's so sick sometimes, laughing over the disappointment of others. It makes me wonder, from time to time, just what goes on in there. *head shake* I dunno. I pray that he'll eventually find himself in a happy place where he doesn't have to take joy in the downfall of others.

Everything is clean in the kitchen. I haven't stopped all day and I feel like just sitting down in the middle of everything and bursting into tears. But I won't. I'll just ball it up and deal with it after the holiday. Just have to wrap up Grandma's gift (a picture and a gift card) and I'll be completely finished with everything for tomorrow except the salami cream cheese rolls and the other little things I'll be "cooking".

K-sis was home all alone today. L was with her asshole of a "father". I really want to go and kick the ever living hell out of that poor excuse for a human. Mom said that K-sis was in tears most of the day. If I'd have known she was going to be home all alone, I'd have said something to M and seen if he'd take me down. (I mean, what's a 2 hour trip each way between siblings? *G*) I don't know what we'd have done, but I'm sure she and I could have thought of something.

Maybe that's it. Or perhaps it's knowing that the holiday is HERE. It's almost over and I'm already feeling the post-Christmas let down. You know, the "man all that work and it's OVER in 5 minutes...tops!" feeling.

Dad's sick too. He started to vomit this afternoon. He hasn't been sick like this in about 13 years, Mom said. I guess a part of me is worried...or at least more worried than I thought I was over him being sick.

Well, time to take dinner out of the oven. Maybe I'll actually feel better after eating something. Yeah...maybe.